Thoughts of Chairman Meow

Archive for November, 2012

Dog. Not gone

Mother has rescued a dog tonight. He was wandering around in the middle of the road, so, like a complete idiot with no regard for her own safety, she got out of the car and went to fetch him. After she bundled him into the car, he promptly fell asleep on the front seat.

Of course, she also had no idea what she was going to do with him after she picked him up. The Police wouldn’t collect him. The Dog Warden only works 9-5 Monday to Friday and she couldn’t very well leave him at the Health Centre. Nor could she have brought him here, I am allergic to dogs…….

In the end, the emergency vets had him. Mother and Auntie Janice took him, having made a makeshift lead out of half an  NHS bandage.  He is microchipped, but, surprise surprise, the recorded owner’s phone is disconnected. He is 15 years old, has arthritis, is probably blind, has a big cyst on his back and two inch long claws. The nice vet nurse said she would give him some dinner, find him a nice bed and get the vet to look at him.

Mother called the dog Albert after the patient she had been to see when she found him. She doesn’t hold out much hope of a happy ending, but at least he’ll end his days with some dignity instead of being trampled by a transit van.

This makes two cats and a dog the night district nurses have rescued recently. I think they should start building an ark…….

Why is everything pants?

Mother has been shopping with Granny this week. For new knickers. Yes, I know. It’s riveting isn’t it?….

They went to a big shopping park, with an M & S, Tesco and British Home Stores. One which  actually lives up to its name and only sells stuff for your house.

Granny asked if she would get her knickers from BHS. Mother explained that it was a ‘home’ store.

‘OK’ said Granny. Then 30 seconds later..

‘Do you think I might get a cardigan from there?’

It’s no point knockin’ if there’s nobody in………………

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